August 13th, 2001

running, bomb tech

Writing Love Letters

I haven't heard from Dave in a week. He's been out in the field, and I've been lonely. He's due back Sunday, that is, today; I haven't seen him online yet.

It's the sort of mood where I want to sit down with a good pen and a rather large stack of paper and write -- just write -- until most of my heart is copied on paper. So much to say, and so few words that directly express the emotion, so we must write around it, around and around in circles around that emotion in the language that poets and lovers must use.

I see Darkside again in the morning tomorrow. Tonight I sit vigil for Sis as she's out on a mission of mercy to Denny's, doing gods know what with Uncle Alan for the continued health and safety of her family. I sit vigil with my Microsoft David, who's toasted off his ass, most likely through chemical means.

Watched a very short version of Romeo and Juliet. Thank you, David from Microsoft. I love you.

I love so many people.

All soggy and showered. Still rather drained of all physical initiative. I honestly think that if either Darkside or Dave were to show up upon my doorstep at this moment, all ready to go, all I'd be up for is a prolonged hug and then a sleeping in the same general physical location.
  • Current Music
    They Might Be Giants (and peppermint schnapps in hot chocolate)
running, bomb tech

Dreamed:

We had started out on a road trip for no apparent reason -- just us three girls -- someone my mind interpreted as my mother, me, and a third girl/woman in a seat further back in my father's old big blue Suburban. I didn't even have change in my pocket, my wallet/ID ... or a pen, which lack I found the most disturbing. "But I've got my sweater!" I said cheerfully -- a grey fleece jacket my mother had made for me.

I remember the road down which we were turning to drive out, driving wherever it was we were going. If we followed it to the end, it would reach Anchorage. We didn't have a clue; we didn't have a care; we were just driving there in the late fall snow. Powder on the ground. No cash. No flashlight. Not dressed for the weather. Three chicks, a Suburban, and a lot of potential trouble.

I was figuring out how I could get my hands on a pen -- should we turn back for my ID and a pen? -- or keep traveling? -- when I woke up.
running, bomb tech

whistling in the dark

Showed up at school about five minutes before six. Darkside glanced at watch, glanced at clock, glanced at me, obviously wondering why I was here so early. Got grouched at for omitting mention of "wash face brush teeth" in my description of my actions in getting out of bed and coming to school. Honestly, do I have to specify every little detail?

Our time for breakfast has become increasingly briefer despite my showing up earlier: we always make a run on the computer lab when it opens, and now Darkside has regular morning meetings with the members of his database project group. Darnit, I'm accustomed to Darkside sitting next to me in the computer lab until one of us has to go to class, making wisecracks at each other about various topics.

Dammit.

I know I'm being selfish and whiny. I don't care at this hour of the morning. I'm grumpy and bitchy and ti--

--and being ambushed from behind by someone who thinks it's very very funny to read what I'm writing about him over my shoulder.

*sigh*

Especially when I don't realize he's there until I hear something resembling a faint snickering noise, or sarcastic commentary, right in my ear.

Men.
running, bomb tech

Yet Another!

It's a sign. I swear it's a goddamn sign.

I'm looking at Exploitation Now and a new character shows up...

Give you a guess as to what his name is.

Let's see. My sister's got one locally. I've got one in Germany, one in Ohio, and just had a conversation with my one in Seattle last night, which David was incredibly high and talking rather randomly about They Might Be Giants.

Apollo 18 rocks, by the way.
  • Current Music
    South lab downstairs
running, bomb tech

I'm in trouble (deep)

Well.

Look who decided to join the party.

Rather, it was the somewhat skittish mind of Azure that decided that because Neighbor was very cute, but more importantly of a generally similar mentality and interest suite, that he ought to be added to the list of people upon whom she's got a crush.

Right now, for practicality, Neighbor is outranking Darkside.

I've decided to make a claim upon him: I've yoinked a few hours of his Saturday evening. He might be under the general impression that this is a group thing -- I shall have to correct this impression.

We did have a rather long discussion regarding romantic lives, and how neither of us has one. Instead of going in search of Darkside and lying in wait for him in the path he would naturally take from his last class to his car, I spend the time talking with Neighbor, and by the time we were done talking, Darkside's car was gone.

You lag, you lose, baby.
  • Current Mood
    torn