I've got all this evil crud in my lungs. My plan for today: sit my ass on the couch or bed and drink tea and do absolutely nothing. I was so tired by the end of work yesterday that I barely made it home; I wanted to walk to the store to get milk and bread, both of which were completely absent from the apartment, and some ketchup, which was dangerously low; I walked up to Chick's apartment to get Dude to come with me; by the time I had gotten there (a very short walk within the apartment complex) I was ready to collapse.
So no work for me today.
Went snippy snippy to friends list a bit over the past couple days. It's been getting too long to keep up with in any sort of sane fashion, and my attention span is shot for the next week or so. Not mad at anyone, of course; how could I be?
Conversely, welcome to new friends... I would put a few carefully chosen words of warning here, a disclaimer of sorts, as to what goes into this journal, but ... why bother?
There is likely to be a high volume of posts in the near future that cover the lousy nature of work, some general feelings of illness and a very specific unhappiness with the crud in my lungs, and the progression of any romance in my life...especially that last.
Not too much 'adult content,' though, unless you count some of the household humor. (I still haven't posted the fishing adventure, have I?)
Is the essential nature of the universe physical and spiritual separate, or physical and spiritual as one?
Is the essential nature of humans good, evil, or neutral?
We already know that the essential nature of cats is whatever they damn feel like right now.
While I was taking a shower last night, he reached his little kitty-paw under the bathroom door and dragged my bra across the floor. Yeah, Cats Do That, especially when there are visitors who aren't quite family yet.
Last night I seem to have been talking in my sleep. I was having a semicoherent conversation with Darkside, from my viewpoint. Dude and Neighbor tell me that I was making rather disconnected comments, starting at being able to feel Darkside through the wall, he seemed pissy, I didn't know enough German and I'd have to be taught, and "Disengage." Somehow the conversation about traffic, and getting to school on time was not spoken aloud. I told him that he needed his sleep. The rest makes sense, except for "Disengage." I have some rather vague theories as to what that might be applied to, but ... glah.
Sis and I were worrying about Nephew not having enough in the way of good male role models while growing up. While Sis was still with her second husband, Nephew had a daddy; that was fine although his ass was lazy and didn't work and he didn't even do a good job as a "homemaker". When Sis moved back in with her parents, Nephew had Grandpa as a role model, however interesting that role model might be.
So when Sis and Nephew and I moved in together, Nephew's main male role models were Brock and Ash from Pokemon. Uncle Darkside wasn't hanging out much. Uncle Alan started to hang out with us, though, and then Dude moved in...
Nephew's got three regular guys to copy from now: Dude, Neighbor, and Alan, not to mention Darkside and Sis's Dave, whenever they show up.
I'm feeling much more secure as a parent-type person these days with all my backup. Whichever president it was who said "it takes a village to raise a child" was right.
Heh. Today -- yesterday, rather -- I noticed that my right wrist was hurting. Today I see that I can't pick up anything with my right hand, nor lean on it. I can type with it, though....
Feels like it's just a bit dislocated or something.
I decided that I wanted to rearrange the house. The problem is that my wrist is very unhappy with me (getting better, though) and I can't move anything. I can pick up stuff with that hand now.
Dude and Neighbor were drafted to move the couch out of my bedroom to the living room where it can be used by more of the household. This also clears out the bedroom for the computer users.
After clearing space in the living room, and clearing the way out of the bedroom, Dude and Neighbor started to move the thing. This was suddenly stopped as I noticed the sharp pieces of wood coming out of the back of the couch. They'd totally wreaked havoc with the sheetrock in the wall behind where the couch had been. The apartment complex here takes a cleaning payment for cleaning up after the mess the last guys left rather than a damage deposit, so we've already paid for what havoc happens to the apartment. Thank the gods. I'm thinking about some plaster and a little paint, though, just to make it look nice again. Argh. I hate it when stuff like that happens to walls.
Dude removed the offending pieces of wood. They are nasty pieces of wood, with many sharp nails protruding. He and Neighbor then removed the couch from the room.
...Well, that was the idea, anyway. I have absolutely *no* idea how Sis got it in the room in the first place, other than lots of wiggling and wobbling and barely scraping it in. Dude and Neighbor and I had to do quite a bit of that move where you go back and forth and back and forth in one very tight spot and can't seem to turn around... think Austin Powers.
After much hassle, we got it arranged to our liking. Nephew's toys will hopefully not be strewn all over the floor, and it is also to be hoped that we won't have to remind him to be careful of the coffee table when he's racing around like a maniac.
Basically, I now have an outline of a plan to call Darkside's attention to the possibility that he might like me "like that."
It's been coming in the air for a while, but learning last night that Darkside is giving poor Neighbor -- well, it's not quite the "evil eye," but it's the Male Vibe that says "This guy is my competition, and I think my competition might be the better man... I don't have a chance" -- well.
Before, there was nothing I could do but wait for Darkside to pull his poor broken heart back together. Now, at least I can apply some crowbar force to his head, which may or may not be lodged securely up his ass.
The cunning plan:
Continue to come to breakfast especially for the purpose of seeing Darkside. Pay attention to him there. Perhaps back off just a touch in the flirting department with him, seeing as it's gotten to the point where we brush hands casually and he no longer flinches back when our hands touch over the RPG he's showing me. Pay attention to him in the computer lab, as usual.
...But when he's busy in the computer lab, and looks like he doesn't want to be disturbed, or between classes when I normally seek him out, I should be friendly and have a chat with Neighbor.
He doesn't get 100% of my attention anymore. It's pissing him off a little bit, but honestly, he needs to learn to deal with it... I have friends. But he doesn't get pissed off when I talk to friends, or talk online to friends. He only gets pissed off when I talk with people I might want to date, or who might want to date me.
In that case, my dear friend from the other side of the moon, it's very much time to get your act together and your ass in gear and make a move on me . . . before it's too late.
I love you dearly, old friend, but ... sometimes it's time to give up and move on.
I can't wait forever.
(I am yours.)