November 23rd, 2001

running, bomb tech

Losing My Religion

...only the language I speak is my religion.

As I have been dwelling more and more often in that place, that frame of mind, where the precise meanings of words are vitally important when you speak, I have been losing the English language.

This is not typically a good thing. Ideas I could have formerly rattled off in a matter of seconds I now must ponder over for minutes, as each word must be precisely in place in order for my sentence to compile correctly.

This slows down my speech greatly, often with pauses of up to 30 seconds between words.

I am losing my language, and I seek to relearn it again.