February 11th, 2003

running, bomb tech

Happy.

And amberite has been here, and there has been much giggling and talking about Stuff. There were 0230 interesting things for belated dinner, following the real dinner at a more reasonable hour, and that would have been all good but for my late-night spacing-out of the unwisdom of running the very loud food processor; this brought votania boiling out in understandable indignation.

There was gossip long into the night, and no elbowing of each other: the floor was deemed unhappy for sleeping on, as my bed is large and sleeps two very comfortably. Even I'm not that much of a bed hog on that bed.

Now, class.
running, bomb tech

Class

I seem to keep getting into the heads of computers. McGuirk got some javascript errors this morning that she was playing around with, and I immediately saw that it was reading the thing as a variable no matter that she'd tried to make it deliberately error by giving it a text string. But when she gave it a number then a letter, instead of a number or a text string, it said it was missing a semicolon.

Interesting.

I like playing with computers.
running, bomb tech

(no subject)

I wonder if he sits up nights with these same doubts and fears. It's terrifying to know oneself to be not alone by choice or by chance, but by nature, if one is truly not a loner...

I've laid my heart open to him. He knows the way I think, react... there must be something of me that is intimately familiar to him from his long years of being alone with himself. Why, if he does not find the icky details at the bottom of my soul repulsive, does he fear that I will withdraw if he shares too much of himself?

I can't answer for him. I can't even know for sure if he's afraid to show himself, or does not wish to, or any of the reasons that could account for the perceived inequality between how much I show of myself to him, and how much he reveals to me.

Thinking about it quietly, though, the percentage that he opens up and that I open up... I'm naturally more open than he is. Hell, I keep an online journal. You can find me by real name through Google. His name returns no hits. That he's shown me as much of himself as he has is astonishing.

I want to see what's down there in him. If he can brave my grungies, I think I might be able to brave his...
high energy magic

Interesting.

Reiki feels gingermint.

Hot and cold, powerful, almost overpowering, but pleasant.
Azzgrin, Azure: Lunatic, crazy

Eris loves me.

She's tiny and grey and has her whole tail. The tire isn't flat anymore.
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