May 28th, 2003

trust, best friends forever, snot-nosed brats


Right, for those not in the friends list... a game of Truth or Dare:
What's the one Truth you wish you could tell Darkside, that he needs to hear?

That I love him, and as long as he cares about me, I'll never ever let him go.

That of all the people in the world, he's the best for me. He's the one who knows me, inside and out. I trust him as I've never trusted anyone before, never had cause to trust anyone before. He sees more of my worst side than anyone else but me, my family, and maybe my priestess-confessor sees. He sees all of that, and he still cares about me. I have nothing left to hide from him, nothing that he won't find out if he wishes to know.

I can't get enough time with him. Even when he's having the bad day from hell, I still delight in his company, no matter how antisocial he thinks he's being. He's a grouch from hell, but so am I, and I have to live with myself. I choose to live with him.
running, bomb tech


I suspect I dreamed of Darkside, as I woke up happy. I can't remember the dream this time, though...
loud fayoumis

Update from Offline

I woke up, at seven, halfway on my way to feeling like shit. But, I was feeling contentment like never before, as I'd known there'd been a dream about Darkside, though I couldn't recall the details. I collapsed and went back to sleep. I muttered the things I'd written: that I adored him, that of course he was a horrible grouch from hell, and so was I, and I *had* to live with myself, but I *chose* to be with him. I couldn't possibly be any less vile to be around than he, and perhaps more so. Sometimes I didn't even feel like living with me. But somehow, he managed to make me okay to stay in the same universe as myself. And I knew that I had to make him hear me.

And I fell asleep again, trying for his arms.

Alarm clock went off, 8:39. I hit the off button, and got a cramp in my right calf, to match the one I'd gotten in my left calf yesterday while swimming. Joy. I crashed back to bed.

The dream.

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I had managed to miss class. Database. Dammit. Little Fayoumis was home from school, with no school-assigned homework. I meandered over to the computer and began the checking of e-mail.

There were two calendar updates from Yahoo, as usual. I knew the contents; deleted. There were three LJ comments: one from a post in kith_and_kin, one sionainn's retelling of her dream, and one (that I didn't get to read yet) from lasayla.

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I need, I think, to update kith_and_kin with my change in relationship status. Equally good, but different.

Our phone line has had EVIL happen to it.

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In one of the dreams, the one at Pearl Creek, I ran into BJ. He was buff; he evidently had been working out. (The level of buffness suggested to me incarceration had been involved.) Evidently, so had I. I failed to hug him, but did lift him up and swing him around just to prove my point that I could. This took him aback more than somewhat; I could see in his eyes that he had not been expecting me to have been working out that much. (I actually wasn't aware, in dream, that I had been working out, so this judgement on his part surprised me.) How amusingly coincidental that I should run into this entry today, while reading the things that I had loaded before offline went...

My friends page has some gems today. Of course, it does every day, but I'm forced to consider them more heavily because the 'net is still not loading (1:09 pm).

kellinator is envious of the tech support guys being able to cuss. [friends-locked] Unto her, I shall share the Family Curse: Collapse )

yaksha42 got to tell his gorgeous business teacher (who is married with children, by the way) about Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls. Go, you. *snicker*

hookncrook's job is safe for another year. Excellent.

rainstorm13: Go, you. Very much so. Heh. Hehe. I should try something like that. I'm going to call Blondie tonight, seriously, and tell him what I had to say to him, but ... I could use a "refresher" like that.

Books: Collapse )

Swimming, learning, and the Little Fayoumis:
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  • Current Music
    Little Fayoumis playing
running, bomb tech

Update from Offline: Part 2

Decided I'd better do what I'd been talking
about, and go ahead and move my bed.
Now, instead of taking up half the room,
it's taller, softer, and somewhat more likely
to fall over.

Little Fayoumis decided that it was his day
to vacuum. Go, him. I'm not about to stop
industrious work; he will be getting the
usual allowance for such tasks.

Last night, he seemed to have forgotten
about putting away his toys; a good 1/3 of
his toys are unavailable to him today, as he
is grounded from the toys that he leaves
out on any given day.

The guy from Qwest just came by. He's
checking the lines outside the place first,
with the idea that those are the most likely
to be having a problem. Next, the inside
lines, I suppose.

I took a shower, meantime, and got all
spiffy for the presentation today. Hooray. I
am 1337. That, and evidently I am some
variety of gorgeous goddess/exceptionally
cute. Cool.


OK. So the guy comes out, and pokes
around in the phone box... and evidently
something is plugged in to the wrong place.


There seems to be a little more going on
with the fancy plugwork, as the 'net just
came unconnected again, and the phone
has no dial tone... again.


What a day.

Furthermore, we'll likely be charged in the
neighborhood of $80 for them coming to
do some plugging and replugging that
wasn't something we messed with in the
first place.

I wish I knew who to call an asshat.


The guy came and knocked on the door
again, and made it clear that everything is
still fux0red, and he's driving off to
a different, higher-up access point to get
things done. He'll try to get it done in good
time, as I do have class to leave for.

(I also have a presentation in class, and
N% forgot to tell me that I was supposed
to be there on Tuesday night to help get all



I am here, with wet hair, in slacks with
malfunctioning buttons, with an inexplicable
tear on the back of my leg (I smack into
things, and take damage, and don't notice it
for a few days sometimes), wearing a
slightly-greyish white polo shirt, with no
internet, and a malfunctioning LJ in the
thirty seconds that the line was up.


At least I have a good book.

Oh, and did I mention that phone being
down means me not being able to call

'scuse me while I hit something.

Well, the van's back. The guy must be
doing something-or-other. Meanwhile, I
have more pages read, and nails that are
polished for the first time in what feels like
a year. And no, not pink. It's a subtle
translucent pearlescent/iridescent pale tan,
which is actually a lot prettier on my nails
than it sounds.

Will have to leave for school soon. Wrote
note for Marx. Goddamn phone errors.
Have not yet gotten to talk to my blondie.
Grr. (sionainn: Blondie
== Darkside. My Pretty's hair is, the vast
majority of the time, not entirely blond, at
least, not naturally so.)
running, bomb tech

LJ/work ethics

When I'm actually supposed to be doing work or paying attention, I feel all right about recording my thoughts, but not reading friends page. Responding to comments is OK by my standards too; this is my method of getting my thoughts going.
running, bomb tech


We survived the presentation, almost with flying colors.

Tony dropped the keyboard, and couldn't get it back up. Karen and I laughed our asses off.
running, bomb tech

Pleased as punch

This is *my* Tetris design.

Demland says that the Tetris group has done the game engine better than anyone else has so far. Not many people take this on because it's so complex.

That's *my* design.

We did forget the little thing about the lines going away, and shuffling down, but... hehe. We got it in there in the nick of time, and that was the one nit he picked.


I rock. I so rock.