August 25th, 2003

running, bomb tech

Scientific progress goes "boink"

I think my brain is broken. I so think my brain is broken. I need to sleep for two weeks; I need to be studied like a lab critter.

votania, you should probably have the last chocolate in the fridge. Large plastic container. Go for it.
running, bomb tech


I may well have been wandering last night. It had that kind of feel to it before I hit sleep.

I realized that I really do need to tell Darkside what is up with that. I'm not sure how long I've been dreamwalking, but I haven't told him yet, and I really do need to tell him...
sad, greensad


It feels like everyone is falling apart around me. I feel like the only one who's whole.

I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm Needed, but I don't know what to do.
  • Current Mood
    scared scared
running, bomb tech

Talking with sisters

swallowtayle called, and we had a good old-fashioned gossip. We talked about everything from the one-man band/show/performer Sexually Active Corpse (he's evidently really good, if odd) to my first boyfriend (not Kermit, who she thought it was, but Mr. Trombone, which surprised the hell out of her).

She thinks the Darkside thing is really cute. There was a lot of squee-ing and giggling. Oh, and Mr. President, and the meow thing... man... evidently this says a lot for a) my self-control, and b) my attachment to Darkside.
high energy magic

*sigh* This is not good for anyone's health.

"You worry too much. You make yourself sad. You can't change fate, so don't feel so bad..."

My Lady is snarling about my lack of a psych degree to wave in the faces of those who won't listen to me otherwise. (She borrows Ro's online 'voice' sometimes. It's amusing.) It's not quite an immediate thing, but it's something looming. I got a taste of it today; fortunately, I think my experience with psychos of many flavours held, rather than book-learning, and justice prevailed (I hope).

Someday, there may be another one who doesn't listen, like the first one. I still check up on that one from time to time. Still lost, that one. I grieve.

I think it was in the book about how the Weaponsmaster came to Valdemar where the man notes that you have all your dead counted for you, and they accompany you. The gods, he said, note down the lives you've saved... you never see the list, but it's kept...

I hope I'm adding to that list, and not the other. I suppose I shan't know until either the list I can see is incremented, or I am told of the other list... I hope I'm doing right things. I swore to do that which is right... and I hope I am. I hope I can.
  • Current Mood
    worried worried
running, bomb tech

It's in my head...

"Red is the rose that in yonder garden grows,
Fair is the lily of the valley;
Clear is the stream that through yonder valley flows,
But my love is fairer than any."