April 16th, 2004

documentation, writing, quill

Evening, more evening

Book club was fun. We discussed The Vagina Monologues. I was more taken with it than a number of the other adults of my parents' generation there. I got to spread some education on a few issues, and was bouncing back and forth to the computer to look up information, especially on the penis puppet people.

Naming our vaginas had really not occurred to most of us in the discussion. I proposed that perhaps this was because they are so much a part of us, so integrated a body part, that the thought of giving it a separate name is alien. The grown-ups from my parents' generation agreed with me: evidently I'd given voice to something they couldn't articulate. We digressed into how the penis is a commonly nicknamed body part, and perhaps this is because it is physically more isolated from the body, as well as having a mind of its own. (This was what prompted the penis puppet discusion.) I do, however, lecture my uterus, on cramps and menstrual timing. I demonstrated some of the lectures, much to the general gigglishness.

I learned that I may want to opt for herbal progesterone cream to apply on the outside of my body rather than doing hormone replacement therapy, to smooth out the menopause.

easalle showed up, wearing wings, and a pretty shiny rainbow skirt!! We were all excellently glad to see her. She gave me a lift home. I'm seriously thinking about doing the bellydancing, because it sounds like a lot of fun.

After I got home, my roommatesister and I went out on a walk to a store up the road to replace a certain bit of equipment. Damn flimsy plastic shit. This was her annual "I will spoil my entire household" moment with the tax refunds, so I got some shiny things. On our way back, we got interesting assorted edibles.

It was a good evening.
  • Current Music
    Kurt Harland - The Terrible Mr. Grimshaw
trust, best friends forever, snot-nosed brats

Diversion Project

I've decided, after some long deliberation, knowing on each iteration of the idea that I was getting closer to a near-to-best idea (what's the mathematical term for the solution that may not be the best, but is damn close?) to divert a large portion of my attention and energies to a good cause this calendar year, from April 16, 2004 to April 15/16, 2005. The good cause I've chosen is the practical (as opposed to the impractical) portions of Project Here, Chick Chick Chick.

There are some very practical portions of Project Here, Chick Chick Chick. One of the practical portions is me getting back in shape. This is already proving to be working somewhat -- I can now walk briskly longer than my roommatesister can, without having to sit down with bleeding feet and zero energy after spending half an hour walking. Another portion is simply me being myself, as tenaciously as I am generally wont to, complete with pulling unexpected wisdom out of my ass. I simply shan't allow untruths to go on being believed, and I will make every reasonable effort to demonstrate that I am in fact a stubborn bitch -- and a few unreasonable efforts as well.

And I shall divert -- sublimate -- other energies, namely the effort I'd ordinarily be putting into my husband-hunt (the one that's been going on since I was five). This is more important. This is where my priorities are. Also, don't be looking for me in bed, as that's a major part of the attention that I'm diverting...

I'd be alarmed, except that it feels so natural and inevitable that I should be formally declaring my intent to focus this way for a set period of time.
  • Current Music
    Eels - Last Stop This Town
running, bomb tech

Things remaining unchanged

My decision to focus my efforts as I've described doesn't change many things, of course.

First, I'm still polyamorous by nature. (Anyone not wanting details on polyamory and how it works for me should probably skip the rest of this paragraph, though there isn't much in the way of *juicy* detail.) When I fall in love, I fail to fall out. This isn't changing. I expect it won't change so long as I live, given that it's remained a constant since I hit the 7th grade. I was perhaps thirteen. I am twenty-three now, going on twenty-four. I have practical experience with polyamory, and I've noticed how these things go for me. I fall in love wherever my fickle attention lands and is held and trust is built, but my focus is very selective and often narrow. If there is no one person that I may focus on, I have a very broad range of expression of affection. If there is one person that I have focused on, then I appear monogamous, because my focus is so specific, even though I am technically not.

Second, I do have a girlfriend. This doesn't look to be changing either. We don't live particularly near each other. That's unlikely to change. I don't babble particularly much about the relationship. Also, probably not changing overmuch.

Third, I have already been focused a lot in this direction already. This declaration is honing and formalizing my focus, rather than redirecting my focus.

In conclusion, I'm stubborn and weird.
  • Current Music
    Donnie Darko ST - Mad World (remix version)
running, bomb tech

*hiss* *fume*

Ok, that's it. Lycos SideSearch is back, ClearSearch is back, and WinPup is back. On my box. Despite Spybot Search & Destroy and AdAware.

I now boycott Lycos and all its works, which means I'll be taking down my homepage that's with Angelfire sometime in the future, and I won't be reading Wired News.