azurelunatic

posters (offering) graphic admonishments against vices that X had never heard of

Helix the Cat and other bad parodies

( Collapse )

This is from 2006 or early 2007, so not everything is going to be relevant now.

1. You have valuable information, like industrial/military secrets, or maybe serious Harry Potter spoilers.


2. Someone close to you is nosy and wants to go through your private stuff.


3. Someone has a grudge on you and wants to dig up dirt, even if there isn't actually any.


4. Your own information isn't very interesting, but there's a chance that someone close to you has interesting information that you have access to. (Think: JK Rowling's literary agent, George Lucas's copy-editor, Donald Trump's secretary, someone on brad's friendslist.)


5. You're in possession of some information you didn't realize was hot.


6. They couldn't care less about your personal info, but from your account they can get inside dirt on the technical details of the operation. (Most common in corporate/government settings.)


7. Woo, an account got set up by a legit user, so they may not notice for a few hours when 10 of my buddies and I start using your account to plaster goatse all over LJ.


8. You may not have anything interesting stored, but that person who trusts you won't suspect a thing if I use your account to ask them something they'd never tell me.


9. You're rich, and they can hax your money.


10. You're not rich, but they can drain your account just as well, and it's a little less well-guarded.


11. You're not rich and have no money, but a credit card in your name spends better than one in theirs.


12. They really hate you and want to screw you over by committing assorted fraud in your name.


13. This account of yours has no important stuff ... except you have it set up as the secondary, in case of lockout, account on those things that are important.


14. It was there; they were bored.


15. They have no interest in your personal details, but your machine is unguarded and will make a great minion in a zombie botnet that is trying to take over the world, or at least take down microsoft.com for 3 seconds.

Types of Hack Attacks:

• Guess the password cold


• Guess the password based on their knowledge of you


• Watch the keystrokes, guess the password


• Guess the password based on general most common used words


• Guess the password based on nonspecific interests


• Use a program that runs words through the password


• Use a program that runs letter combos at your password.


• Find where you have your password written down

1. I shaved half my head in 2001. This was during a fight with my then-fiance, the details of which are not particularly important. It was incredibly self-destructive, and looked pretty hot, in a quasi-De'lenn sort of way.


2. I have been engaged twice. Legally, I've never been married. Religiously, I have. The two of us were the only two witnesses, pledging ourselves to each other. We made up the vows on the fly. "By my heart and my life, I am yours, always and forever." (Hey, we were ~20.) I had been thinking about involving my soul in there somewhere, but something warned me at the last minute to not do that. I listened. I'm glad. I don't often think of myself as divorced, but from a certain perspective, I kind of am.


3. There are things I would never write in public. There are things I would never write in quasi-public. There are things I would never write on private. There are things I would never write on paper. There are things I would never say. Some of them are because I don't want them to get out. Some of them are because I suspect they might happen, or be happening, or be true, but if I write them down, that makes it potentially real and not just in my head where it might just be me.


4. Related, but not quite the same, there are things that I have to talk about to certain people before any others. Certain of the very most important ones, I have to tell my best friend first before anyone else. Other things, I can't announce in public until I've told the most important people first, but I can announce in less-public places. Darkside Must Know First is no longer quite so strict, now that I'm no longer actively courting him, but it's still something I take into consideration with important pieces of news. Sometimes, telling only one person in the hierarchy means it's OK to take it public. Other times, everyone in the usual hierarchy has to know. It depends. Darkside and Dawn get to hear a lot of things first, as do my roommates. IRC is next, or subsets of IRC, or subsets of the friendslist, depending. Then the whole friendslist at large. Then the public.


5. I like dressing up boys in girl clothes, but not necessarily because I find it hot (sometimes I do, sometimes I don't, depends on my attitude towards the guy in question) but because it's fun. Compare my ability to create costumes from available wardrobe.


6. I can't remember learning to read. I am sure I have some scattered memories from before the time I could read, but I never remember a struggle to disencode English. (Encode it, on the other hand ... my hand/eye coordination was really not fond of writing.)


7. I have been threatened at gunpoint because a gay man hugged someone. (The tale appears in my AK-47 Guy tag.)


8. Before I took the driving test for my driver's license, I had to perform car repair above and beyond what the average teenage girl has to know how to do. I was using Mama's car for the driving test on Monday. Mama had a Saab at that time. On Friday, the water pump blew. This was Fairbanks, Alaska, so there was one auto shop in town that fixed Saabs, and they were booked up until Tuesday. Tay-Tay had a horse event the whole weekend, and Dad was stuck driving the truck to pull the trailer for same. Dad got the water pump and a kit to flush the system, pulled down the correct manual, coasted the car down in front of the house, and cheerfully let me know that, well, here I was! Then he zoomed off with the horse. Some hours and swearing later, the doctor next door dropped by just in time to give me an adult-male-muscled hand with the awkward bolt that was not turning far enough or hard enough in the limited space, because my teenage-girl arm couldn't budge it. I passed the driving test on Monday. (Six months later, the seal on the water pump blew. If it had been installed tighter, like a professional would have done, something more expensive would have blown. So it was a good thing all around.)


9. When I cry hard enough to make the whites of my eyes turn pink, my eyes look electric teal to me.


10. I don't mind doing the dishes, but putting them away is another story. I don't have that one figured out.

In the last 24 hours, I posted the following to Twitter:

• Monday, 0024: |clocktower: http://tinyurl.com/6z4yj3
• Monday, 0134: I find this hilarious because I am familiar with the original. (Political) http://gomilfy.com/
• Monday, 0217: My Burt's Bees lip balm often meets an untimely end in the wash. This time I saved it. My typing gloves are getting a much-needed wash.
• Monday, 0316: I have cleared out the used pages from the 70-page notebook that easalle issued me at some point. Yay productivity, even misplaced.
• Monday, 0317: @semanticist Is not every day 'talk like a LOLcat day' on the internet?
• Monday, 0424: shout-out to samurai_ko and husband inserted in phone book search <3 (first names only)
• Monday, 0515: Twitchy. Got some writing done, some re-reading done, some tagging done.
• Monday, 1139: @afuna predilection?
• Monday, 1259: Callback from best friend. Series of timely puns. <3
• Monday, 1351: "We appreciate your patience while we're helping other customers. Please stay on the line, & we'll be with you in a moment." Sprint hold LOL
• Monday, 1431: This hold music is better. Getting SF number for cellphone.

Follow me on Twitter.