I now have SHORTS! Yay, shorts. I'd debated getting some last time I was shopping, but decided against it. That had been the correct decision, because this time they were a good 60-something percent off, marked down to $2 a pair.
So, I now have enough pocketless navy blue shorts to last a year or two, or at least until the end of the next major screaming heat wave of the sort that leaves mere mortals screaming for mercy and throwing themselves in the nearest bonfire just because it looks like it might be cooler than the weather outside.