Azure Jane Lunatic (azurelunatic) wrote,
Azure Jane Lunatic

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Things remaining unchanged

My decision to focus my efforts as I've described doesn't change many things, of course.

First, I'm still polyamorous by nature. (Anyone not wanting details on polyamory and how it works for me should probably skip the rest of this paragraph, though there isn't much in the way of *juicy* detail.) When I fall in love, I fail to fall out. This isn't changing. I expect it won't change so long as I live, given that it's remained a constant since I hit the 7th grade. I was perhaps thirteen. I am twenty-three now, going on twenty-four. I have practical experience with polyamory, and I've noticed how these things go for me. I fall in love wherever my fickle attention lands and is held and trust is built, but my focus is very selective and often narrow. If there is no one person that I may focus on, I have a very broad range of expression of affection. If there is one person that I have focused on, then I appear monogamous, because my focus is so specific, even though I am technically not.

Second, I do have a girlfriend. This doesn't look to be changing either. We don't live particularly near each other. That's unlikely to change. I don't babble particularly much about the relationship. Also, probably not changing overmuch.

Third, I have already been focused a lot in this direction already. This declaration is honing and formalizing my focus, rather than redirecting my focus.

In conclusion, I'm stubborn and weird.

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