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The Reassuring Note

Back when I was visiting Guide Dog Aunt over the December 2000/January 2001 school break, she got a note home from school saying that she had to pack an earthquake kit, with some basic supplies and "a reassuring note", in case of emergency.

Guide Dog Aunt is not good at writing reassuring notes. I wasn't very good either. What we did came out something like this:
Since you're reading this, you're obviously alive and you have your earthquake kit, so things aren't as bad as they could be. I'm not very good at writing reassuring notes, but if things are so that you need your earthquake kit, you are probably in need of cheering up. So. Here are some jokes.

So then we hit Google, and found some joke sites. We picked and chose -- only the finest went in. It wound up being about three pages long.
Gone away, gone ahead,
Echoes roll unanswered.
Empty, open, dusty, dead.
Why have all the Weyrfolk fled?

Where have dragons gone together
Leaving weyrs to wind and weather,
Setting herdbeasts free of tether;
Gone, our safeguards, gone, but whither?

Have they flown to some new weyr
Where cruel Threads some others fear?
Are they worlds away from here?
Why, oh why the empty weyr?

-- "The Question Song", Anne McCaffrey
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