amberfox recommended "Orobourous" to me a while ago, an HP satire/crackfic. I have no idea who the author is, but the fic includes passages such as "If you feel strongly, I suppose we could also consider adoption, but it would be nearly impossible for you to pursue any of your long term goals with a child in tow. You are, after all, seventeen. And using it as a romantic plot device is rather sickening, frankly, Miss Granger. A child is not a nifty handbag, nor is it a kind of glue used to cement couples together."