Azure Jane Lunatic (azurelunatic) wrote,
Azure Jane Lunatic

I shall now sum up a whole pantload of inspirational e-mails.

Most people do have "that friend" who sends them around. And, well, yeah. These were impeccably timed for me, but I refuse on general principle to do the spammy e-mail forward thing. Welcome to LJ, where the cut tag is my friend, and the scroll button is yours if these are not for you today.

  1. Jesus was probably happy and laughing and grinning and playing with kids some of the time instead of all gloomy-like all the time! [illustrated]

  2. A whole bunch of pictures of roses! Long friendship, unconditional love, financial wealth, everlasting happiness, success, knowledge, family, honesty, beauty (inner and outer), and a few just for kicks! Oh, and a long and healthy life. When we come to the edge of the light of what we know and head out into the darkness, either God will provide something solid to stand on, or yay wings! [But I'm not that Irish, am I?] Send these to your friends ASAP and make a WISH!

  3. Thinking of you -- bless you, just 'cause. In cunning rhyme! With blinkie animated fun!

  4. All those funky coincidences? No such thing as coincidence. It's ... GOD! Yay!

  5. Uplifting inspirational story about a special-needs kid getting included in a game of baseball. Footnote with a reminder that the obscene tends to make the rounds more quickly than the inspirational, and shouldn't it be the other way around?

  6. A cunning manual counter in the subject line of the e-mail indicates how many people have said this prayer, added one to the number, and forwarded it before it got to you! [prayer is sized h1]

    It is a day, I am alive, and I have the use of my body and mind. There are so many blessings I have. Even though I screw up.
    Keep me safe and give my attitude a kick in the arse, because I could use it. Help me clear my mind so I can hear it when the Universe talks to me. Help me be accepting of the stuff that comes my way, rather than cranky about it like I am usually. If I don't have any control over it, what am I doing angsting, huh?

    Even when I can't put my thoughts into coherent order, I know that the Universe listens and knows what I really do want. I am a tool in the hands of the Universe, and wish to continue that way. I do good works for others without even knowing how much good I do, and I want to keep on with the doing that. I can be strong for others. I have words of encouragement -- may they be the right ones. The lost, confused, and misunderstood are in my thoughts. Those who can't, don't, or won't listen to the subtle whispering of the Universe -- sucks to be them, hope they figure it out soon. And am I ever glad I do listen to that. A'tha is an immense part of my life. Everyone should have peace, love, joy, and understanding of the Universe.

    And ... PASS IT ON! [Enjoy some broken HTML! And ... message repeats. Except not with h1. Here's the public key of someone, I have no idea who! Message repeats again! Complete with public key. Wow, we're all kinds of blessed today. And again. Wow, this was forwarded a lot.]

  7. Best wishes for everyone, cunningly illustrated! Comfort, cheer, rainbows, laughter, sunsets, hugs, friends, beauty, confidence, faith, courage, patience, love, blessings. [The confidence illustration was the best, a German Shepherd plastered to the door frame at the vet's.]

  8. *nudge* Guardian angels come in unlikely forms; one of the more likely is that of your friends. And looks like I'm deputized to inform y'all that there is at least one good thing coming your way today. [Cunningly illustrated with a photo of a sleeping baby wearing a crown of rosebuds.]

  9. A conversation between this dude and God:
    Dude: *whispers* "Speak to me."
    God: *meadow lark sings*
    Dude: *doesn't make the connection* ... *yells* "Hey! I said SPEAK TO ME!"
    Dude: ... "Okay then. Let me see you?"
    God: *star twinkles*
    Dude: *hollers* "SHOW ME A MIRACLE!"
    God: *healthy, happy, loved & wanted baby is born*
    Dude: ... *sniffles* ... "Just touch me? Let me know you're there?"
    God: *butterfly lands on dude*
    Dude: *brushes off butterfly* "SERIOUSLY, I NEED SOME HELP HERE!"
    God: *forwards an inspirational e-mail*
    Dude: >DELETED< *bawls*
    God: *facepalm*

  10. Seminary school. Teacher has everyone draw pictures of people who have pissed them off recently, post them on the corkboard, and throw darts. Class has delightful and slightly dangerous moment of catharsis. Teacher takes down pictures, takes down covering on corkboard, and reveals what was posted behind -- yeah, you guessed it! Lesson from Matthew 25:40 slammed home unforgettably.
    [Message that follows was phrased in a gratingly religious fashion, vs. an upliftingly religious one. The burden of which was "Stop laughing at those really dreadful shows on TV and then wondering why the kids are emulating those same lousy shows. And one of the greatest evils is those who say they believe and then act like utter asshats in the name of what they 'believe'. Don't be invisible. Be a force for good."]

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