I have a difficult time staying attracted to someone who does not engage my intellect. Pornography that does not engage my intellect in some way is boooooring and soon fails to arouse me at all. This could be either active or passive engaging of intellect, by the way: it could be a very simple something, arousing my imagination, which then does the rest of the work, or it could be an active storyline with intriguing characters that pulls me in and works on me, with me.
I also have a habit of getting into a state just this side of arousal when working on a particularly complex problem that delights me. "I just finished my program! Let's fuck!" is a rather simplistic way of putting it, but I do find that any state of high excitement is far more likely to arouse me than a state of low excitement, and intellectual excitement counts very high.
I am wondering if there are people for whom intellectual stimulation is a physical turn-off, and if so, what is their relative intelligence, and how is their intelligence tied into their sexuality?
For those moments when non-sexual intellectual stimulation interferes with my sex life, I view it as overriding the sexual, rather than surpressing it. There are certain moments when my sexual awareness overrides my brain's processing of any academic matters.
I find that the best time for sex is following an intellectual climax, a completion of some academic-type work, and the best time for academic-type work for me is following sex, with my brain refreshed and all ready to work.
If I had not developed my academic skills in step with my awareness of my own sexuality, would my sex life and my programming/writing skills be so well in step with each other? I doubt it.
My social skills developed late. They're still not very well integrated with either my academic self or my sexual self.
I reach a certain level of intuition, of trance, with both matters sexual and academic. Interrupting me in the middle of programming or writing will get approximately the same frustrated hostility that interrupting me in the middle of sex will. I have a very similar place where the mind goes consciously blank, and the body continues doing what it's doing in both cases: sometimes I wake up from writing or programming trance to find that I've just done something excellently well, and I have no real idea of how I've accomplished it, in the same way that I may blink several times after a prolonged session of very pleasurable sex with no real conception of how, exactly, physical motions combined to do whatever it was that was done, but my, did that feel good!
Hopefully this'll be a better starting point for discussion than the entry a few days ago was. I tend to do most of my thinking internally, and must be prodded to expand on what I've said, and get some of the thought processes that spurred my conclusion out there for everyone else to share.
As iroshi has to put it, "Unpack, Azz!"